feeling a need

here i am, i am here.
i'm still here.

my shoulders are aching from sitting here on these projects every moment i can, or even moments when i have to steal away.  tomorrow is the due date for this big infograph project and i am having mixed feelings about it...  it's been a lot of hours and a lot of work and nights of staying up until 1am.

a friend pointed out that she heard this site was a scam, so i googled it.  i found this link and it makes me stomach hurt.

http://www.brianyerkes.com/crowdspring-a-writers-story/

i don't know what is true or not but i guess i must admit that i am not surprised if it is some sort of scam.  either way, i'm submitting this piece tomorrow.

here are a few that i have submitted while away (no dice)









mentally exhausted.  poor sleep habits.  
the kids are seemingly sick... moses had a fever last night and chloe has been out of sorts which basically means she screams and cries like she is being eaten alive by a tiger.  

i have so much work to do.
i am trying to get my act together for the christmas craft fairs.  i need to list all the goods and set deadlines each week to make sure everything gets done, there is just NO WAY i will be able to handle the usual "YOU HAVE TWO WEEKS LEFT" Marathon that usually takes place.

super emotional.
constantly wondering who i am.

i find myself constantly quoting Steve Zissou
"am i ever going to be good again?"
whatever that means...  since that would imply that there was a point in my life when i was GOOD.  and what is the definition of GOOD in this context anyway?

the buttons have been successful this week.  the last Saturday before school had people in friendly and generous moods.  i have to stop underselling my product despite what i think parents are willing to shell out for their kids.  i've been selling them at $1 which is nothing and does not account for much of the time and materials and novelty.  Novelty is important.  i made $15 on 9 buttons.  i made 6 copies for one guy and another random lady (young but dressed very professionally) came by, didn't say a word, picked 3 off the display and handed me $5 and walked away.  a couple in our condo came by and the wife requested i do some up for her golfing ladies.  

then upon pick-up requested i do a set of 10 for her husband which turned out super rad



pretty hilarious

she is such a cool lady and she is so sweet to the kids.  she said she would have a couple more batches she would like soon.  hooray!!!

this happened the other week when i was checking my email


coco managed to escape her highchair to eat on top of the table.




i don't know what i'm doing with my life.
I HAVE AN INTERVIEW FOR THRIFTY'S ON TUESDAY :)

all this no sleep and kids being nuts and working too much is making me super emotional and moody and teenagerish.  feel like doing drastic things.  feel like things are crazy.  i always have to think of the worst situations possible and tie them together to make a super sad story and compare my life to it to make me feel better.  

money is not good right now.  i really hope the interview goes well.

i'm so tired.

chloe's first (blueberry) pancakes



momo's first roasted marshmallow



M&M's
(thanks Ada!)


i LOVE this new Paul Frank shirt from my sister!!!!


totally effing ridiculous
wearing my moccasins and my sunglasses

104lbs
7 more to go





Comments

  1. that is some really good design.

    good luck with the interview!

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