mo&co updates

so here we are, chloe is almost one and moses just turned 2.5.

as i live in constant paranoia and awareness of birth order and what effects that has on their development, i would like to take a moment to ponder chloe's walking.  she has been standing a lot this passed month, more and more comfortably, even on her own from a squatting position.  she will actually do a few squats sometimes.  she will let go of a supporting object and be freehanded for a second to turn to another means of support.  she continues to take one step before squatting down or falling into my arms.  god i love it when she falls into my arms!  then i get to snuggle her chubby loveliness and hear her little giggles.  kevin and i also love how she will often lean her face onto our shoulder when she feels extra affectionate.  those early days with moses are long gone as i will later elaborate...

ANYWAY!  with moses, we kept pushing and pushing him to walk as all his friends pretty much walked around 10-11months.  he walked on his first birthday.  as first parents, we panicked like first parents.  it didn't matter that it was totally normal for babies to walk later but a month is a long time for first parents and when other kids (younger, same aged, older...) achieve something, the anticipation for your own child to follow can get out of hand.  with chloe, we sobered up and realized that kids are going to do things when they are ready no matter how much you push them.  all the same, i am wondering if she would be walking already if we had pushed her the way we pushed moses?  i have to consider things like her environment and how it is ENTIRELY different than when moses was learning.  he had free range whereas she has limited range with all the toys everywhere and of course, moses himself roaming around and interfering.  i have to consider that his birthday is in May when the weather is nice for practicing outdoors and chloe's birthday is NOW in the cold, rainy season.

i wonder about firstborns and the fact that they do get their parents' undivided attention.    not just attention but constant encouragement to start doing everything as soon as possible.  does this affect the mentality of firstborns?  does everything have to be done right away and perfectly?  are firstborns more often perfectionists with the highest standards?

with chloe, we did not do anything near the amount of forceful tummy times and rolling escapades that we did with lazy moses.  she has done tummy time, rolling over, sitting up, crawling, and standing all before moses and with little encouragement.  we were convinced she'd be walking at 10 months.  i am not concerned for when she will walk because i know it will be soon, the way things are going, but i am wondering if any prodding and more practice would make much difference?

is chloe going to have lower standards?  is she going to be more laissez-faire?  is she going to have "realistic" standards?  will those "realistic" standards keep her from dreaming big?  will she settle into something rather than push herself 150%?  to be continued....

alright.  on with the updates.


MOSES
Moses enjoys talking to strangers.  He is a very friendly little person although he does play shy on certain occasions.  Whenever there are people coming in or out or joining us in the elevator, he bursts into conversation, saying "HI!!!!" and then barfing out a bunch of information about his toys, usually cars.  Then yells "Byyeeeeeee" as he zooms out the elevator or down the hall.

When he doesn't know the name of something or a person he says "I can't tell that one!"

He has gone full blown into pretend play with all his toys!  It's really very awesome.  So far, his main thing to start off is "Hi!  Where the park is?"  He mostly plays with his cars from Cars - he's now up to 6 characters and I have one more for his christmas stocking - but he's been playing a lot with a few select stuffed animals including Carl the Crocodile seen in the last few photo updates and these two bunnies


we just named them last week
Marshmallow & Rootbeer

Both bunnies are staple gifts from kev's older sister.  She gave us the brown one for Moses for his baby shower and the white one for chloe's.  MOSH-mallow and ROOOOT-beeya...  

He has been watching Cars 2 a lot.  I am trying to regulate his tv time but I can't help but admit that it really does the job!  I have been trying to save TV time for when chloe is napping so that he is occupied enough to allow me to get things done.  I will sometimes cave in to letting him watch in the morning while I get breakfast together or after breakfast so I can clean a little before the mess gets too out of hand, especially if key and i were too busy/tired to do it the night before.  anyway, he has been watching it and quoting certain things.  the last thing i overheard him quoting in perfect tone was "I don't need your help, I don't want your help!" (race car McQueen to his bff tow truck Mater).  

this concerned me a little, mostly because of the situation.  it was not a positive quote and i obviously don't want him picking up bad things.  SIGH.  and i know that i am such a huge culprit when it comes to teaching him not good things.  i've had a few rough days in the last two weeks.  my patience is taking a beating and my impatience is having more heydays.  it is really so so challenging to be a parent!  you can't say anything!  they say it right back to you and at this age, they say it in the correct context!

here are some of his "favourite" learned sayings
I'm so TIRED of you!
I'm so TIRED of it, so tired of it!
I'm so ANGRY at you right now, I'm so angry at you right now, Mummy.
(said with clenched teeth, chin down, and eyes looking up)
funny though, he learned the word "cross" from a Thomas the Train episode and wove it seamlessly into
I'm so CROSS with you Mummy/I'm so cross right now...
I DON'T WANT TO! - this has settled back down to the proper "No thank you"

well I guess those are really only two sayings.  sigh.  it's hard to be a parent.  it is hard to be pushed to your limit everyday and to not be able to have some sort of outlet to express your feelings of frustration.  and when you do, they end up coming right back at you!  i have spoken with other parents, and it seems that at this stage, most of the kids are all in the same boat.  they are acknowledging their feelings and learning to express themselves and so obviously they learn to do that from example.

i am worried.  i am a very emotional person and express myself very openly and when i have my bad days where i am so anxiety-ridden that i drive in circles around town or stop and park to try to decide what to do, i end up moaning about how i don't know what to do and moses has started to say he doesn't know what to do sometimes when he is upset.

reading has been about the same.  no new breakthroughs.  i have continued to point to the words as i read and ask him to sound out certain words (or just the titles) that are fairly simple.  kevin brought up some of my old childhood books when he brought the christmas tree from storage, and i am ELATED that moses loves two of my all time favourites!



this book is so awesome because it totally touches on how kids are so particular about having things a certain way and how frustrating it is for parents to deal with this mentality.  the best example in this book is when the little girl replies "But juice tastes better in my RED cup!" when the mom says "What difference does it make, I already poured your juice into the GREEN cup!"

AND

another less known book called Scaredy Cat.  it is a flip book about a cat that goes around the farm scaring the other animals and gets scared by them in the end.  my sister read it to me all the time when i was young and it was so crazy the first time i got to read it to moses!  time flies.  i distinctly remember lying in bed with my sister and i remember every intonation of the way she read it to me.  i can't wait til my sister arrives next week and gets to read it to moses!  i'm pretty sure i have mentioned it before, but i really truly love how moses has his favourite stories but it still very open to enjoying new books.

(i think i have to save coco's updates for another day....)

moses has become very good at manoeuvring a computer mouse.   he also really enjoys one of my favourite childhood snacks (which i'm sure is pretty common...) grilled cheese with alphabet soup!  he dips the grilled cheese and slurps the soup.  i realize the salt content is pretty high so it is a treat rather than an everyday sort of thing.  it's so wonderful seeing him enjoy being able to recognize letters.  i wish all meals were so easy.  he has good nights and bad nights.  we know what he LOVES but we obviously can't eat the same thing all the time and we don't want to limit his palate.  both of these kids love eating indian food.  he is less stoked about risotto...  and really dislikes tomatoes and red bell peppers and cabbage and onions.  

and i think i will end with potty training.  i have been a brave mother!  he has been wearing underwear 95% of the time that he is not sleeping.  he has been really excellent with the occasional accident when we are out.  i have buckled down and gotten used to asking him 50 times a day if he needs to pee and to make sure he goes before we go out.  i am learning to deal with taking him to public bathrooms which i hate but it has been successful so far.  HOORAY!

sigh.  parenting is not fun.  ok it is but god it is a constant struggle.  you never feel like you are doing a good enough job.  you try and try but sometimes you have nothing left to try with!  at the end of everyday, you assess your day and you will always have a list of shortcomings.  you always feel like you could have handled a situation better even when it was TOTAL bullshit and no normal person would ever take toddler bullshit from a grown person.  every word that comes out of their mouth is a reflection of your competence and effort.  every downfall on their part is a downfall on your part and there are just too many things to teach.  i am so sick of listening to my own voice.  i know why parents nag.  it's because at this age, they do the same stupid fucking thing a dozen times an hour every hour.  i keep wondering if there is a different way of parenting that doesn't involve bribes or threats.  yes, of course i will throw in the calm logical explanation of why we have to do something or can't do something, but they just get bored to death listening to your voice and end up cutting you off with something completely off topic.  well fuck you too!  



Comments

Popular Posts