Happy 60th Dad

i'm really having a hard time keeping up with the blog these days!  so many projects going on with so little time while still taking care of my kids everyday is a huge challenge and leaves me utterly exhausted at the end of every day.

the tree panels looked beautiful!  Em & Mike's farm wedding was utterly breathtaking and perfect down to every detail.   we had such a fun time with amazing food and super friendly guests.  i can't wait to start editing my photos to share!

and yes, in between all of this running around, i have been desperately trying to get all my things in order for tomorrow's launch for my fundraiser that's happening in 2-3 weeks!

i'm a day late posting things, but i just don't have enough time every day to do everything i want to do.  yesterday was my Dad's birthday.  he would have turned 60.  we probably would have had a big party in my parents' backyard with all our family, my kids running around til late after helping my dad to open presents and blow out his candles.  it would have been lovely.

instead i decided to head into Burnaby and for the first time in maybe 7 years, visit Ocean Park cemetery.  i stopped visiting my Dad's grave only a few years after he had passed.  i hated the feeling of  standing over top of him while his body lay cold and decaying beneath my feet.  i also hated feeling like THIS is where he was when in my heart, i felt like he was always with me.  i didn't want to have to visit this sad place to be close to him...

yesterday was different.  i have been talking with the kids about their Lolo (i'd rather call him their Gung Gung, but my mom has already coined him as Lolo to the kids...) in the last few months, and although chloe is still pretty young, Moses seems to have an awareness and a basic understanding of death and loss.  he is very sweet.
  we arrived.  it was a super hot day, like the day of the funeral.  the sun was beating down, even the kids were drowsy, lethargic and complaining about the heat.
the kids and i walked through rows of headstones, trying to locate ourselves while kevin ran further up to bring us one of the burning cans.
 we finally found it
moses very carefully spread out the two drawings he made earlier that morning overtop of my Dad's headstone and would lovingly rearrange them whenever the wind blew them out of place.
 the top picture features 3 racing cars while the bottom shows my dad as the train conductor   
 we brought some of the new incense that i just received from my cousin Nik for my birthday
chloe sat on my lap while i had some quiet time of my own 
we pulled up the big burning can to send up moses' drawings to my Dad
thank you kevin for taking these photos for me
*heart*

so, i didn't mention prior to this.  our morning began at Jade's house.  after breakfast we headed to her place to get our hair done.  i needed mine blown out to look nice for the video that lindsay would be shooting of me later that night for my fundraiser page.  Jade kindly cleaned up kevin and did a small number on moses as well.  we had a quick sushi lunch in Steveston before heading to the cemetery.  i had hoped to be home by 2:30pm, but we didn't get in until almost 5pm.  lindsay arrived shortly after we did.  i didn't take photos of the amazing dinner kevin put together, but it was essentially a build your own taco buffet, vegetarian style with soy cheese!  endive shells with poblano peppers, refried beans, butternut squash, tomatoes, soy cheese and salsa verde for topping.  everyone also had a few soy cheese quesadillas and a kale & coconut salad *new fave*

it was getting dark quick and in the mess of all the things i have been juggling, i had not had the opportunity to write out what i would be saying for the video.  i did my best and we filmed a few scenes at home before running out to Centennial for more video and a bonfire! 
you know what i love the most about bonfires?  is getting super stoked for them only to arrive to locked up fire pits.  so disappointed as lindsay and i had initially booked the night to have a break together and enjoy a fire at the beach.  at least we had a gorgeous moonlit evening.  the evening was warm, as was the water.
 this goofball looks so good with his new haircut.  clean.
 my angel boy
 "i"
  i can't wait to launch the fundraiser tomorrow.  lindsay did an incredible incredible job putting the 3 minute video together.  her shots are so creative and thoughtful, her timing is perfect, she really cares about what she is doing and is so talented at capturing the world.
is this not unreal?  i don't know if i have ever seen a view like this in my entire life.  moonlight on water is something i have only seen in cartoons and in the drawings i did as a child.
a lovely end to the evening


happy birthday Dad
thanks for the beautiful view




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