Free As A Bird


the day was hectic.  so hectic.  all the prep and errands leading up to set up time was crazy, but everything came together so well thanks to Caela who came early to babysit the kids and help with small tasks.  kevin's mom sewed up these banners for me and i spent an hour, before driving into Richmond to get my make up done, cutting out a stencil and painting the text onto the banners.  upon arrival, KLF hung them perfectly.
we were a little late for set up.  we brought everything only to realize we forget to pack the tables to put everything on...  that's ok, i needed kevin to go get me my earrings anyway. 
don't know how this day would have happened without these two crazy Geminis.  they manned the table, giving everyone the down low on the event and taking donations.
good people.  seriously good people.
 KLF had her friend Sean make this platform.  i painted it the evening before and kevin used the 4 original panels that he had made for the birch tree panels project for the backdrop.  so smart to angle it so that it was a diamond instead of a square.  more space for moving around the chair and the panels just happened to fit perfectly.  this amazing chair was lent to us by miss Janine Pham, younger sister of Joan Pham, a highschool classmate and one of the most amazing people i know.
 KLF is a genius.  she found these props at Dressew.  PERFECT.
Erin and Kerstyn of Our Little Flower Company outdid themselves with their flower head wreaths, boutonnieres, and mini bouquets.  Kerstyn was also so kind as to offer her photography skills to take the majority of the photos throughout the evening.  with so many weddings and all my photographer friends booked for the weekend, I was so relieved to have found a photographer whose work i so greatly admire.
 just a small taste of their work.  really, Kerstyn, you should have taken 1000 photos of your booth but i  know you both were so busy wowing everyone that walked by!!!
 gorgeous
gorgeous
Em & Jess made it and immediately bought some headpieces
while Eve & Devin chowed down on our Change A Life cookies!
 my bro and cousin Jason arrived
the twins (yes twins!)  joined us for the evening.  it's been so long since i met Rempel i can't even think where or how we met.  OH.  i think we met on Myspace circa 2004?  i don't think we've seen her since moses was 3 months old, so like 4 years ago.  Rempel donated a free haircut and 25% off vouchers at iDaburn Salon for the raffle! 
Neighbour Cait showed up just in time with baby Nate :)
less photobooth action than i had hoped but we still got a bunch of goodies 
7:45pm came up fast.  i ran up to the stage to announce the head shaving and kissed my cousin/BFF Lauren on the run back to my chair.  
we only had a small window before the band started playing again.  Jade literally arrived, parked and got to work.
i don't remember who emerged from the crowd... Serena?... to give me a handful of tissues
 feeling the time crunch to keep up with the 3 song playlist and beat the stage band, Rempel got up on the platform and joined Jade in tying my hair into 6 ponytails...
 so frazzled from the moment i woke up, everything seemed surreal.  with no mirror in front of me, it was hard to believe any of this was happening...
 ponytails were quickly tied to Rough Gold's "Can't Keep This Alive"


the first cut
one by one
they piled onto my lap
 it was a really nice turnout.  friends, family and strangers gathered around the booth.  it was so lovely to see so many faces of loved ones in the crowd, showing their support.
    with all the ponytails in my lap, Jade began the shaving...
"Strangers" began to play my my chest grew tight.  i have been moved by this song many times, watching, in slow motion, as the Brothers from The Darjeeling Limited approach their moment of freedom, the turning point in their spiritual journey following their father's death.  i have envied that moment for a long time, and here it was... finally.  
i didn't cry for my hair.  i can't say having a mirror would have made a huge difference because the entire thing was too surreal.  whatever i had envisioned for weeks prior to this moment, i no longer remember.  
it wasn't for my hair, it was for the relief, for finally being able to let go of my regrets, for finally being able to forgive myself, and to finally feel worthy. 
my sweet boy whose only complaint was that my shirt was too dirty with hair for him to sit with me
i did it.  it happened.  i was finally free.
The Pixies "Where Is My Mind" came on as my head entered a new place, a new beginning
it was awesome.  i felt exhausted, but it was awesome.
things come together, they always do.  i would have never thought that this beautiful woman and i would have crossed paths so many times throughout out childhood, teen and adult years to bring us this very special moment.  i would not, could not, have had it any other way.
my mom
she was really proud of me and kept telling me how beautiful i was
no words
BFFS 
(i shouldn't have changed tank tops, i was wearing the same one!)
kevin's Nana and Grandad.  two of the most inspiring people i have been blessed to know
they said it probably would be too late and that they probably wouldn't make it, and they did!
a photo with my brother and his crazy crew
my family.  my beautiful beautiful family.
how did i get so lucky.  there are too many blessings to count.
Kerstyn, Erin, Baby Mae, and Jen:  The Amazing Girls from Our Little Flower Company
thank you to Cait and Kevin for helping to make over 100 of these cookies

sigh.  it's 2:36am.
i will be uploading ALL the photos to thepauhaus.com tomorrow
along with all my thank yous















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