father figure eights

i started this on father's day, posting a month later, but dating it for father's day
this might be the most peaceful father's day i've had.
i just went to reference 2004-2009 of my live journal entries, but found absolutely nothing but the brainlessly inane garbage that i used to spew.
perhaps there were private entries in my actual written diaries... i'm not about to crack that pandora's box, so i'll move on.

i've been wanting to write for a while, but i feel like the wait was with a purpose.
i have never felt more open and free than i do right now.  i have finally come to a small enlightenment that has really set me free from... myself.  i would have written "others" but part of my so-called enlightened mind knows that it is not others, but myself, who has the control over my reactions and my perspective.

this past year has been a year of personal growth.  it's been a great challenge, but i feel like i've truly made some leaps and bounds and i am now definitely where i wanted to be when i started.

single-parenting aside, today was probably the best father's day i've had ever.  i feel proud of myself for finally getting to the place where my dad tried to get me at the tender insecure age of 10. the day was mostly uneventful, which was more than fine with everyone because kevin had much work to get done.  we celebrated Hallmark's Father's Day in the morning and let the rest of the day unfold to the same beat as every other day.  our friend kate has been in and out with us as she transitions into van life and kevin has kindly offered his knowledge to help with what he can.  the kids loved it and over her visits from the city, developed some good time bonding.   

we've got a real gem of a Father Figure in this house and i am thankful everyday for the amount of effort and care he puts into his family.  i'd be a pretty lost cause without him.


we need to go to Palm Springs, kevin says.


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